Firstly, I’d like to thank everyone that was able to make it to our show with Andrew W.K. in Covington a few weeks ago.  And also a big thanks to Andrew W.K. for having us. It couldn’t have been more fun. Well, ok. It could have been more fun. There was no slip n’ slide. Even still, it was just about as fun as it could have been without a slip n’ slide, so I’d say it was a mostly successful party time.

JULY AND BEYOND
So in early July we’ll be driving our way West to hop on a plane in LA that goes to the fancy upside down world of Australia, AU. It looks like we’ll be playing some rock and roll shows on our way out there, so get your asses ready Southwest. Since we’re on a mission to get to Aus, we only have a handful of US shows to announce, but we may have a few more pop up on the way there and back (keep an eye on our Facebook, Twitter and Tour pages). With that being said… do all you LA people remember that last Roxy show? It was absolutely nutballs. Well, get ready, because here comes round 2. You seriously don’t want to miss this one. Joining us that night will be Daikaiju and Sugarplum. We’ll also be making our way back to the lovely hot land of Phoenix (joined by our good friends, The Minibosses and Mega Ran) and the glorious whale’s vagina, San Diego (joined by our good enemies, The Megas, as well as our new friends, Daikaiju). And just added a couple of days ago is the always luxurious Austin, TX (joined by our Texan brothers, Urizen) at the even more luxurious Red 7. If you live in the affected areas (or know someone there), start spreading the news!

As most of you already know, PAX Australia has been sold out for quite a while now. And I know most of you have shorted out your computers with all your cry baby tears falling into your keyboards. Well, you can now stop crying all over your valuable electronics. I’ve got good news. Now that we’ve finally got them booked, we can officially announce that we have a couple other shows in Melbourne right after PAX. We’re playing Act I on the 23rd and Act II on the 24th at Evelyn Hotel (along with some other tough jams). Not only that, but we’ll be making our way up the coast to Sydney so we can play a couple (or few) shows there before jumping on a plane to head back to the States.  The Sydney shows won’t be Act I and Act II, but don’t fret… every show we play in Australia will have drastically different set list, so do your best to make it to all of them, because you won’t see the same thing twice (also, who knows if we’ll ever be allowed to come back??!)!

And to celebrate our first trip down there, we decided to put together the most appropriate T-shirt design we could think of (that’s one bad ass kangaroo).

This limited run of Protomen Australian Summer Camp ringer T-shirts is being printed only in Australia. If there are any left over when it’s time to head back to the US, we’ll drop them off at our new Australian online store for worldwide sale (we’ll also have Australia specific versions of some of our other existing designs, as well… more on that later). Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “… but, Commander B. Hawkins, it’s Winter in Australia right now. You can’t have Summer Camp in the winter.” Shut your mouth. I don’t want to hear any of your backtalk. We say when it’s summer camp time. And when we go to Australia, it’s gonna be summer camp time. Deal with it. We’ll just call it the the WinterSummer Camp Tour 2013.

Also, we’re extremely happy to announce that we’ll be joined by our good friend MC Frontalot on every one of our Australian shows! Tell everyone you’ve ever known… and then tell all the strangers you’ve never known. We’ll need all the support you can muster.

JULY
09th – Austin, TX – Red 7  *ALL AGES*
11th – Phoenix, AZ – Pub Rock  *ALL AGES*
12th – San Diego, CA – Soma  *ALL AGES*
13th – Los Angeles, CA – The Roxy  *ALL AGES*
19th – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (no show/hanging out)
20th – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (show day)
21st – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (no show/hanging out)
23rd – Melbourne, AU – Evelyn Hotel (Act I)  *+18*
24th – Melbourne, AU – Evelyn Hotel (Act II)  *+18*
27th – Sydney, AU – The Standard   *+18*
28th – Sydney, AU – Annandale Hotel  *+18*

We’re gonna meet John Farnham, Olivia Newton John, Icehouse, and AC/DC!!! (not really)

-Commander

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It’s been nearly 10 years since this death train started rolling, and if you’ve ever seen the late Tony Scott’s 2010 film, Unstoppable, you’ll know that it’s gonna take both Chris Pine and Denzel to stop us… and neither one of those dudes even know we exist. Nothin’s gonna stop us now! To celebrate, we’re throwing a super fancy birthday party for ourselves at Mercy Lounge this Saturday (27th). It’s gonna have all the exciting things that a good 10 year old birthday party should have (except rollerskating… maybe next time we’ll have a Jimmy Caan Rollerball party!). Come for the free cake, ice cream, balloons, face painting, and piñatas… stay for the rock and roll excitement! Get your tickets here, and get them quick… people like ice cream and balloons. And if any of you bring Chris Pine or Denzel to our show, we’ll kick your ass.

APRIL
27th – Nashville, TN – Mercy Lounge (Ten Years Of Fury) **18+

Joining us on Saturday is the always amazing Makeup And Vanity Set and our long time friends (but first time show-mates… sort of) Hanzelle! But speaking of Makeup And Vanity Set… if you haven’t already checked out his/their (he just got a super good drummer) new EP, you should do so immediately. It’s really freaking good. Listen/Buy it here.

Also, the super fancy 10 year anniversary poster you see above will be on sale at the show on Saturday. It was put together by Caspar at Version Industries and will look very nice on your wall or in your cubicle. As usual, if any survive the night, they’ll go on sale at the Sound Machine Store the following morning (Sun. 28th) at 11:59am CST.

Protomen with Andrew W.K.!
In case you somehow missed it in the last mailer, we’re finally getting to play a show with Andrew W.K. at the end of next month in Covington, KY (Cincinnati area)! It’s going to be amazing, and you should be there to bask in the party. Get tickets before they’re gone.

MAY
26th – Covington, KY – Madison Theater (with Andrew W.K.) **ALL AGES

AUSTRALIA 
If you haven’t gotten your PAXAus passes yet… guess what. You’re shit out of luck. They’re super sold out.

The good news is… we’re gonna play more Australia shows besides PAX! We’ll give you more info on that as soon as we can. Until then, start spreading the word down there. We’ll need all the support you can muster. We’ll also need a pet wombat. Get ready.

JULY
19th – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (show date TBA)
20th – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (show date TBA)
21st – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (show date TBA)

*more shows for Australia on the way. Stay tuned.

You can’t make me quit,

-Commander

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So, we’re about a week into this tour and it’s been some kind of good. Birmingham was great, SXSW was fun, and Knoxville was fancy, but I’m not writing this mailer just to tell you how much fun we’ve already had. I’m writing this mailer to tell you how much more fun we’re GOING to have. On top of the already great lineup of shows we have coming up, a few new shows have been confirmed since the last mailer and it’s time to tell you about them. *Note – If you’re sad that we’re not playing your town, believe me, we’ve shed just as many cry baby tears. But remember that the only way for us to someday get to your town is by playing shows in other towns.

Don’t forget that we’re playing at Andrew W.K.s Santos Party House tomorrow night. It’s seriously one of the most fun venues that we play, so don’t miss out. If you haven’t already gotten your tickets, get on it. They may be gone by tomorrow. And I know this one doesn’t count as a newly announced show, but you’ll soon see that it works as an acceptable segue, so deal with it.

Speaking of Andrew W.K…. (see that segue?? like butter.)
We’re opening for him in Covington, KY (Cincinnati-ish) on May 26th! We’ve been wanting to play with him since we started this band. And I’m not talking about playing kickball or something (we already did that with him in 2004… while blasting a newly mixed “Hope Rides Alone” over a big PA system. Looking back, it seems really strange, but I’d like to think it made us all better people). I’m talking about playing a fancy show with him, and it looks like it’s about to happen. And if you get tickets right now, you can save a couple dollars by entering the following code on the ticket page: theprotomen

That code is only going to work for a very limited time, so get on it quick and spread the word!

MAY
26th – Covington, KY – Madison Theater (with Andrew W.K.) **ALL AGES

TEN YEARS PARTY
On April 27th, 2003, we were balls deep in the studio writing, recording, mixing, and then releasing a little ditty called “Fade To Phil.” That little ditty turned out to be “Due Vendetta.” It’s been ten long years since that fateful Dodge’s Chicken filled night when we inadvertently started this band, and we thought we’d advertently celebrate those ten years on April 27th at Mercy Lounge in Nashville. Tickets aren’t available yet, but keep your schedule clear for that day. It’s going to be one hell of a thing. I’ll probably let you know on this mailer machine, but just in case, pay some attention to our Facebook and Twitter situations.

27th – Nashville, TN – Mercy Lounge (Ten Years Of Fury)

Another show that’s appeared since the last mailer is the PAX After Party with MC Frontalot, Bright Primate, and The World Is Square. The one last year was amazing, and this one looks like it’s going to be even better. Live it.

Here’s the full list of shows. Get tickets before they’re gone.

MARCH
20th – New York, NY – Santos Party House
22nd – Boston, MA – PAX East (show day)
23rd – Boston, MA – PAX East (hanging out)
24th – Boston, MA – Middle East (PAX Afterparty)
26th – Danbury, CT – Heirloom Arts
27th – Teaneck, NJ – Mexicali Live
29th – West Chester, PA – The Note
30th – Pittsburgh, PA – Altar Bar *All Ages
31st – Cleveland, OH – Beachland Tavern

APRIL
02nd – Toronto, ON – The Hoxton
03rd – Ann Arbor, MI – Blind Pig
04th – Grand Rapids, MI – The Pyramid Scheme
05th – Indianapolis, IN – Old National Centre
07th – Chicago, IL – Lincoln Hall
09th – Dekalb, IL – The House Café
10th – Madison, WI – High Noon Saloon
11th – Minneapolis, MN – 7th Street Entry *18+
12th – Eau Claire, WI – No Brand Con (show day)
13th – Eau Claire, WI – No Brand Con (Q&A day)
14th – St. Louis, MO – 2720 Cherokee
27th – Nashville, TN – Mercy Lounge (Ten Years Of Fury)

MAY
26th – Covington, KY – Madison Theater (with Andrew W.K.) **ALL AGES

JULY
19th – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (show date TBD)
20th – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (show date TBD)
21st – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (show date TBD)

See you soon,

-Commander

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Welcome to the wonderful world of Presidents Day. If you’ve never been President, guess what. This is not your day. Come on, now… cut that out. Don’t start crying. You can go get your own day… or better yet, become President! I know… exciting, right? Well, unless you weren’t born in the US. If that’s the case, I guess you’re shit out of luck. This will never be your day. Unless that law from Demolition Man gets passed and Arnold Schwarzenegger becomes president. I guess you should probably get your ass to Washington and start lobbying to get that law passed… for your sake, and for Arnold’s… and for Demolition Man‘s credibility. If not for Arnold or yourself, do it for Demolition Man.

Speaking of Demolition Man, it’s almost that time again. The snow is about to start melting, bears are about to wake up and make their bear-sized cups of coffee in their bear houses, and we’re about to go on tour again. It’s nature’s cycle.

Here’s what we’ve got on the books so far (a few more shows may pop up between now and then, so keep your eye out if it looks like we’re coming close to you):

MARCH
02nd – Nashville, TN – Mercy Lounge *FREE SHOW – 21+
12th – Birmingham, AL – Zydeco
14th – Austin, TX – Empire Control Room (SXSW) – 8pm
15th – Dallas, TX – The Door
17th – Knoxville, TN – The Bowery
20th – New York, NY – Santos Party House
22nd – Boston, MA – PAX East (show day)
23rd – Boston, MA – PAX East (hanging out)
24th – Boston, MA – Middle East (PAX Afterparty)
26th – Danbury, CT – Heirloom Arts
27th – Teaneck, NJ – Mexicali Live
29th – West Chester, PA – The Note
30th – Pittsburgh, PA – Altar Bar *All Ages
31st – Cleveland, OH – Beachland Tavern

APRIL
02nd – Toronto, ON – The Hoxton
03rd – Ann Arbor, MI – Blind Pig
04th – Grand Rapids, MI – The Pyramid Scheme
05th – Indianapolis, IN – Old National Centre
07th – Chicago, IL – Lincoln Hall
09th – Dekalb, IL – The House Café
10th – Madison, WI – High Noon Saloon
11th – Minneapolis, MN – 7th Street Entry *18+
12th – Eau Claire, WI – No Brand Con (show day)
13th – Eau Claire, WI – No Brand Con (Q&A day)
14th – St. Louis, MO – 2720 Cherokee
27th – Nashville, TN – Mercy Lounge (Ten Years Of Fury)

**More shows and ticket links may show up in the next few days. Keep your eyes on our Tour Page, and get ready.

SUPER AUCTION PARTY
So, here’s the deal, we’re kicking off a new situation where we auction off our old shit and give some of the money to charity. We’ve been thinking long and hard about how we should think long and hard about what to call this new auction initiative, and I think we’ve finally landed on this catchy title, “The Protomen Auction Off Their Old Shit And Give Some Of The Money To Charity.” Man, that’s a good title. It’s so good, I don’t think we could have come up with a better title if we had actually thought about it! No less than 25% of this auction action will benefit the American Brain Tumor Association and Childs Play. The remainder of the proceeds will go to helping us buy less broken shit.

Here’s what we have to offer so far:
Murphy’s Original Big Bass Drum Head
Turbo Lover’s Suit
Sir Robert Bakker’s guitar
Reanimator’s Custom Kick Drum Head
Panther’s Flash Shirt and Aviators
Commander’s “Hope Rides Alone” Drum Set

More stuff will more than likely appear in the future. Keep your eye on our Facebook and Twitter situations in case anything new pops up before the next mailer.

Speaking of charities, our friend Jonathan Coulton is sticking it to the man while doing some serious good for The VH1 Save the Music Foundation and the It Gets Better Project. Check it out, and support the causes.

AUSTRALIA TOUR
Hey Australianesians, do you know of any good bands down there that we should tour with in July?  If so, send an email to contact(AT)soundmachinerecords(DOT)com … also, does your water spin clockwise or counterclockwise down the pooper drain?

JULY 
19th – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (show date TBD)
20th – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (show date TBD)
21st – Melbourne, AUS – PAX Aus (show date TBD)

The Last Cassette Unicorn
Just a heads up to you slackers who haven’t gotten your “Drove All Night” cassette already… you’d better quit slacking and grab one immediately. They’re almost gone… FOR…EEV….VEERRR…

——————————————–

And with that, I’ll close with a couple pertinent Presidential Quotes:

“Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.” -George Washington

“America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we didn’t go to rock shows.” -Abraham Lincoln

——————————————–

Be well,

-Commander

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Before we get started with this mailer situation, I just want to issue a quick warning. This is a mailer full of pictures. If you don’t like pictures, you should close your email right now. Also, you should just stop and take a long hard think about your life. Why would you not like pictures? I understand not liking bad pictures… but not liking pictures in general? That’s weird.

Now, with all that business is out of the way… let’s get on to some pictures!

CASSETTE SINGLE RELEASE!

DECEMBER
21st – Nashville, TN – 12th & Porter

The picture you just saw is the fancy cassette we’re putting out tomorrow night. It’s a single of “I Drove All Night.” It’s one ferocious jam. The B-side is a reworked version of “Breaking Out” and Mike and The Mechanics’ “Silent Running.” Artwork was done by John DeLucca and Caspar Newbolt of Version Industries. If you think the outside looks nice… wait till you see the inside artwork. This is an incredibly limited release, so don’t miss it. Whatever is left over from the show tomorrow night in Nashville will go on sale at the Sound Machine Store at 10am CST Saturday morning.

Also available at the show for the first time will be this magical new Breaking Out shirt. It’s super sassy… and magical.

Maybe you need 3 of them. Just ask these people…

As for tomorrow’s show, I have some unfortunate news. Due to unforeseen circumstances, Makeup And Vanity Set will not be joining us and Uncle Skeleton at 12th And Porter tomorrow night. We’ll all just have to bring the thunder for him.

Come on… wipe those tears. It’s not all bad news… tomorrow night we’re gonna play a jam from Act III!

ACT I VINYL
The second pressing of the Act I vinyl is finally here. This time around we pressed it on black 180 gram (sounds very nice). It comes with a large poster of artwork and liner notes, and the original endings of Hope Rides Alone and Due Vendetta are still intact. Get these while they last… again.

This long sleeve black version of the very first Protomen shirt design will also be making it’s debut tomorrow night. Look at fake KILROY striking a pose down there… you know you want it.

Not actually KILROY…

All of this (and more!) will be available tomorrow night (21st) at 12th And Porter in Nashville (and will be available online at 10am the following day). So get your ass there. This stuff ain’t gonna wear and listen to itself.

Also, since the world is ending tomorrow night anyway… you might as well buy about 10 of everything, right?

Speaking of new things… our Zambooie store has a new hoodie. Check it out.

END OF THE WORLD CONTINGENCY PLAN
If the world somehow doesn’t end tomorrow, and you’re left sitting around wondering what to do with the rest of your life, maybe you should start it off right by making your way to Armageddicon in Columbus, OH to party with us once more! And then less than 2 weeks after that, we’re playing at MAGFest right outside of D.C.. Show the end of the world who’s boss. Spit in the face of the apocalypse by showing up to both of these post-apocalyptic shows.

DECEMBER
22nd – Columbus, OH – Sheraton (ARMAGEDDICON)

2013

JANUARY
05th – National Harbor, MD – MAGFest 11

Speaking Of Post-Apocalyptic…
We are taking a trip to Australia next year (July 19-21) to play PAXAus and fight for some precious juice. We don’t know what day we’re playing PAX yet, but you better go ahead and grab your passes before they’re gone.

See you on the other side (or tomorrow night),

-Commander

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I trust everyone had a great Thanksgiving (except for those of you who aren’t United Statesians. In that case, I trust that you all had a great Thursday devoid of extreme turkey-gluttony and naps). We had a lovely Thanksgiving… thank you for asking. That being said, this mailer was supposed to be sent yesterday, but guess what… I was too busy eating leftover turkey and napping.

Now that our brief break is over, we’re right back in the studio, so I’ll try to keep this short. This is the last mailer-style warning before our quick 3 night stint (Dec. 12-14th) with I Fight Dragons, MC Lars, and SKYFOX. It will (more than likely) be quite a while before we’re back up that direction, so don’t skip it because you want to sit around and play your Pac-Man video games. If you live in the affected areas and are still ticketless, you should fix that immediately. Who knows how long they will last? Spread the word.

DECEMBER
12th – Covington, KY – Madison Theater
13th – Grand Rapids, MI – The Pyramid Scheme
14th – Chicago, IL – The Metro

We added another show the next night on our “way home” in Madison, WI. For those of you who are good at geography and such, you may already know that Madison, WI is in no way on our way home… but that’s just how we do. Either way, we’re excited to be making our way back to the Madison area. Hold on to your butts.

15th – Madison, WI – The Frequency

On December 21st, we’ll be playing a fancy End Of The World Show in Nashville at 12th & Porter. I’ll go on record and say that you don’t want to miss this one. Makeup And Vanity Set will be joining us, as will Uncle Skeleton. We’ll be celebrating our newest fancy release, a super bad ass cassette single for Drove All Night from our forthcoming covers record. The B-side is a revamped version of Breaking Out (as well as other secrets). Intriguing, right? Also… we just may play that Act III jam again… and maybe some other things. Come end the world with us!

21st – Nashville, TN – 12th & Porter

The next night (if the world somehow remains), we’ll be playing in Columbus, OH at Armageddicon‘s End Of The World After Party. Honestly, if the world doesn’t end the night before, the kids of Armageddicon are sure to do the job on the 22nd. They’re absolutely insane. Don’t miss this.

22nd – Columbus, OH – Sheraton (ARMAGEDDICON)

CYBORG MONDAY – WWW.ednesday
For those of you who don’t know already, today is/was Cyborg Monday. A day of online savings, shopping, and superness. Our SoundMachine Store is taking part in this fancy online sale, but we’re not stopping there. We’re extending our savings over the next 3 days. Cyborg Monday, Terminating (prices) Tuesday, and WWW.ednesday (we just coined that… and if we didn’t… don’t tell us). It is a storewide 20% discount ENDING at 11:59PM CST on WEDNESDAY. We need to make room for some fancy new merch things on that page, so buy it all before it’s gone.

To get the discount, enter this Discount Code at checkout: FLOORSABOVE

Also coming down the pipeline very shortly is the 2nd pressing of the Act I vinyl. Instead of colored vinyl, this time we’re doing 180gram vinyl. It’s sure to sound even better than the last version (which I think is already the best sounding release of that album). Only 1,000 are being pressed this round, so keep an eye out. We’ll let you know when they’re ready. And before some of you ask… the long rumored Act II Vinyl is in the works, too… we swear (it’s just a little further off).

Since we’re in the re-releasing mood, I supposed it’s time to bring back a slightly revamped version of the first shirt we ever made. This heather grey American Apparel shirt will be very limited in quantity (300). Check it out. Get one or twenty before they’re gone again.

;

MAGFest 11
If we make it through the month of December, you should all come celebrate the world’s survival with us in National Harbor, MD (right outside D.C.). MAGFest 11 is happening from January 3rd-6th, and they’ve asked us to come play some fancy jams for them! It’s going to be one hell of a weekend. We play on the 5th (Sat). Here’s to hoping the future still exists… Get tickets now!

We need all the hope that we can get,

-Commander

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What are you doing this Friday? Coming to Murfreesboro, TN for a rock show, that’s what. And don’t give me none of that, “but I live in the Ukraine. Murfreesboro is just too far of a drive…” nonsense. You can make it. It’s for a good cause and everything. The show is at the Walnut House and is sponsored by the ever awesome YEAH and the Tennessee Arts Commission. The show is all ages, and YEAH will be giving a free live sound and lighting workshop (at 7pm) before the show starts. We’ll also be helping out where we can. Along with that, we’ll be doing a Q&A sort of deal when the workshop concludes. How strange and exciting is that?? Get tickets HERE before they’re gone!

If, for some weird reason, you decide that you’re not up to the challenge of driving across the Atlantic Ocean, you can check out what YEAH is up to and maybe make a donation to support their support of rock and roll kids.

OCTOBER
26th – Murfreesboro, TN – Walnut House

Also, don’t forget about our three shows in December with I Fight Dragons, MC Lars, and SKYFOX. These shows will be the most awesome. Get ready Cincinnati (area), Grand Rapids, and Chicago.

DECEMBER
12th – Covington, KY – Madison Theater
13th – Grand Rapids, MI – The Pyramid Scheme
14th – Chicago, IL – The Metro

And if that isn’t enough December action for you… you might want to keep your schedule clear for everyone’s last night on Earth. We have something brewing for December 21st here in Nashville.

SALES PITCH AREA… BEWARE!
In case you somehow missed the last mailer that announced how we updated our site with a new Digital Downloads situation… well… we updated our site with a new Digital Downloads situation. High quality MP3 and FLAC versions of our albums are now available directly from our own site. Check it out if you hate getting physical.

On the other hand, if you still love touching things (and Olivia Newton-John), and the idea of giving away the things that you touch, it’s probably a good idea to start stockpiling ProtoMerch to prepare for the incoming Holidays. Give out the gifts that keeps on giving. Merch Stores are here: Zambooie and SoundMachine.
END OF SALES PITCH AREA.

It’s time to wrap this up, but I just want to let you know that things are going super swell in the studio right now. We hope to have something to show you from covers land you soon.

Stay strong,

-Commander

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The One Last Summer Tour 2012 has come to a close, and we’ve all been crying happy and sad tears for the entire week that we’ve been back. I’ll go out on a limb and say it was by far the most fun and successful tour we’ve had so far, and it’s all thanks to everyone who came out to rock and roll with us. However, as fun as it may have been, it’s great to be home.

Now that we’re back, you may be wondering what we’re going to be doing for the rest of the year. Well, for one, we’re already in the studio trying to finish off this covers album. After that… it’s right back into the studio to work on something else…

In the mean time, we decided it was time to shake things up on our website with a quick front page redesign, and also the addition of some fancy new features. For instance, people have been asking about high quality/uncompressed digital downloads of our albums for a while now. We figured it would probably make the most sense to just go ahead and offer them from our own site. So… Available now on Protomen.com are high quality versions of our albums in MP3 (320 kbps) and FLAC format (NOTE – these digital formats do not contain the liner notes/story and artwork). As always, we are much in favor of everyone having physical versions of our albums, but we also realize that there are those in this world who prefer the intangible. They’re such a mysterious bunch.

Check it out:      PROTOMEN.COM

While you were checking things out on the new site (you did look at it, right?), you may have noticed the tour poster we made for this past tour. We sold out of them,  but when we got home, there were fifty more unexpectedly waiting for us. We didn’t plan to sell these online, but since they exist… maybe some of you that couldn’t make it to the shows can snatch them up. Hop on it. Also available now on the store is the limited edition screen printed El Corazon poster that was a joint venture between us and Supercommuter. These are also in very short supply.

Some of you Twitter and Facebook types may have noticed the rumblings and rumors of shows that have been popping up recently for the end of the year. Well, it’s for reals.  Come on, now…. you had to see this coming, right? You didn’t actually think we could stay off the road for that long, did you? We will be jumping on the I Fight Dragons, MC Lars, and SkyFox tour for three shows at the beginning of December. Get ready Chicago, Grand Rapids, and the greater Cincinnati area… Three days of pure excitement and wonder are headed your way. Tickets available below.

DECEMBER
12th – Covington, KY – Madison Theater
13th – Grand Rapids, MI – The Pyramid Scheme
14th – Chicago, IL – The Metro

I think that about wraps it up for now. It’s time to get back to recording things.

We’ve still got work to do,

-Commander

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This one is gonna be quick and dirty… not the upcoming tour… that’s gonna to be slow and clean (probably not actually slow or clean. I just needed antonyms.)… this mailer is what’s going to be quick and dirty. Either way, get ready for this quick and dirty mailer and this slow and clean tour (again, probably not actually slow or clean).

SUMMER TOUR

Below is the complete list of shows we will be playing in August and September (with ticket links). Several shows have been added since the last mailer, so check it out. This will more than likely be our last big tour of the year, because we have a lot of work to do when we get home. Grab your tickets soon. Shows are meant to sell out.

AUGUST
04th – Orlando, FL – The Beacham (NERDAPALOOZA FEST)
05th – Orlando, FL – The Beacham (NERDAPALOOZA FEST)
08th – New Orleans, LA – House of Blues
09th – Houston, TX – Fitzgerald’s
10th – Dallas, TX – Prophet Bar
11th – Austin, TX – Red 7
12th – San Antonio, TX – Korova
14th – Tucson, AZ – The Hut
15th – Phoenix, AZ – Rhythm Room
17th – San Diego, CA – Soma
18th – Las Vegas, NV – Hard Rock
22nd – Anaheim, CA – Chain Reaction
23rd – Los Angeles, CA – The Roxy
24th – San Francisco, CA – 330 Ritch (venue change… now 18+)
25th – Reno, NV – Alley
28th – Portland, OR – Hawthorne
29th – Vancouver, BC – Biltmore
31st – Seattle, WA – PAX Prime (sold out) (we play this day)

SEPTEMBER
01st – Seattle, WA – PAX Prime (sold out) (hanging out this day)
02nd – Seattle, WA – PAX Prime (sold out) (hanging out this day)
03rd – Seattle, WA – El Corazon
05th – Salt Lake City, UT – Kilby
06th – Denver, CO – Marquis Theatre
08th – Oklahoma City, OK – Conservatory
09th – Memphis, TN – Hi-Tone

Don’t miss these shows. This will probably be the last time we come around for a while.

BAKKER DOES EBAY
Sir Robert Bakker has decided to part with his “A Night Of Queen” show guitar on the Ebay. I figured you might want to know about it, so here it is *listing ended*.

photo by: Miriam Blais

Here’s a little bit of info from the Ebay page (get more info here *listing ended*):
“This is the Squier Special Edition Standard Stratocaster Sir Robert Bakker modified for Brian May-style switching and signal flow. This guitar was acquired particularly for use onstage in the Protomen CD release show for The Protomen Present: A Night of Queen.”

If you’re into stuff like this, stay tuned. We’ll be selling off more little ditties in the weeks and months to come. We’ll keep you notified with Mailers, Twitters, and Facebooks.

See you next month… and the next month… but probably not after that.

-Commander

Tags: Protomen News by The Protomen
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ANOTHER NIGHT OF QUEEN.
The album release show for “A Night Of Queen” was an absolute blast of fun times. A huge thank you to everyone who came out and partied with us. Another big thanks to Makeup And Vanity Set and Devin Lamp for bringing their respective Moroder and Bowie to the show. It was the icing on the already awesome cake. But not to be outdone, Tenacious D decided that icing wasn’t enough and they went ahead and dropped a gallon of ice cream right on top of the night by showing up and joining us for Bohemian Rhapsody. As some of you may have noticed, the Hollywood gossip machine jumped on board and gave the whole world the scoop. Thank you, Hollywood gossip machine, you’ve brought our lifelong dream of gracing the pages of TMZ and Perez Hilton to fruition. We’ve made it… this far.

All in all, it was one of the funnest* nights we’ve had in a very long time. Thank you.

* shut up, grammar nerds. I command that “funnest” is now a real word.

PROTOMEN AND TENACIOUS D IN TORONTO.
Speaking of… Don’t you dare forget about our Toronto show with Tenacious D in a few days. It’s going to be the most exciting Super Post 4th of July Extravaganza that Canada has ever seen. Get your tickets as fast as you can. And if, for some reason, you live up that direction and aren’t making the trip to Toronto, make sure you give it your best to be at the three awesome shows we’re playing on the way home. Pittsburgh, Columbus, and Cleveland.

AUGUST-SEPTEMBER TOUR.
This is a big one. Get ready, SouthEast, South, SouthWest, West, NorthWest, and… Center (you should be called the MidWest, but somehow Ohio already claimed that). We’re coming for you.

We’re starting it off right by driving down to Orlando, FL to play the shit out of Nerdapalooza 2012. We’re not just playing one show… we’re playing two. That is one more show than one show. One night of Protomen, and one night of Queen. From there, we’re going to play our way across the country to the West Coast, where we will then play our way up the West Coast to the NorthWest, after which we will play our way across the middle of the US on our way home. That’s a lot of playing our way places, but that’s what we do. Be there to see it happen.

For those of you who have been asking… Yes, it’s true. We have once again been summoned by the PAX Lords (they demand that we call them Lords) to play some jams up in Seattle, and once again we have accepted their summons. As always, we couldn’t be more excited to play those jams for the Lords of the PAX and everyone else, but unfortunately, if you don’t already have a pass to PAX, you probably aren’t going to be able to hear those jams. It sold out immediately. For those of you who already have a pass… congratulations, you are the victor/s. However, Seattlonians… if you didn’t get a PAX pass, don’t cry tears out of your face. You can catch us the day after PAX at El Corazon. Our show there last year was amazing, and so it shall be again. Don’t miss it!

If you see a location near you on the following list, grab your tickets before they’re gone (some dates don’t have ticket links – we are trying to rectify that).

JULY
05th – Toronto, ON – Echo Beach (with Tenacious D… Again!)
07th – Pittsburgh, PA – Altar Bar
08th – Columbus, OH – Ruby Tuesday Live
09th – Cleveland, OH – Beachland Ballroom

AUGUST
04th – Orlando, FL – The Beacham (NERDAPALOOZA FEST)
05th – Orlando, FL – The Beacham (NERDAPALOOZA FEST)
08th – New Orleans, LA – House of Blues
09th – Houston, TX – Fitzgerald’s
10th – Dallas, TX – Prophet Bar
11th – Austin, TX – Red 7 —- ALL AGES
12th – San Antonio, TX – Korova
14th – Tucson, AZ – The Hut
15th – Phoenix, AZ – Rhythm Room
17th – San Diego, CA – Soma
18th – Las Vegas, NV – Hard Rock
22nd – Anaheim, CA – Chain Reaction
23rd – Los Angeles, CA – The Roxy
24th – San Francisco, CA – Broadway Studios/Mabuhay Gardens Room
25th – Reno, NV – Alley
28th – Portland, OR – Hawthorne
29th – Vancouver, BC – Biltmore
31st – Seattle, WA – PAX Prime (sold out) (show day tba)

SEPTEMBER
01st – Seattle, WA – PAX Prime (sold out) (show day tba)
02nd – Seattle, WA – PAX Prime (sold out) (hanging out this day)
03rd – Seattle, WA – El Corazon
05th – Salt Lake City, UT – Kilby
06th – Denver, CO – Marquis Theatre
08th – Oklahoma City, OK – Conservatory
09th – Memphis, TN – Hi-Tone

*more ticket links are on the way. Keep your one good eye trained on our Tour Dates page for updates.

Makeup And Vanity Set and 88:88.
Some of you know about this already, so I apologize ahead of time for talking to you like you don’t know anything. Last month, Makeup And Vanity Set released his soundtrack album to the short film 88:88 (if you don’t have it already, you should fix that… it’s awesome). At some point during the month, it came to our attention that the film was entered into a fight to the death in the Youtube film festival. We need your help to smash all of the other films (as good as they may or may not be). If they get into the top 10, 88:88 gets into the Venice Film Festival. If they win, Ridley Scott gives them a $500,000 production grant. Click on the awesome GIF below to watch the film and vote once a day until the internet breaks.

Holy shit, this is a long mailer,

-Commander

Tags: Protomen News by The Protomen
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