Release The Beast…
Last night we bid farewell to our dear friend and ally Armando Apache Putay. He left the Thundercon, never to return. His days are over in this dark world….he’s gone on to a better place….a place on high….a place with central heat and air…a usable kitchen…and a train with several dogs in the back yard. Though his doors are small…you need only duck to gain entry. Last night, the sky was clear and our hearts were warm with the fires of memories past, as he walked his final walk down the Steps of Thunderconia. We loaded up Jesse The Interceptor with all of his worldly belongings…knowing very well that he can’t take him with him on the final journey…but he can enjoy them for now. There are no words for the amount of sadness we feel this day….but I suppose you could say that we have at least several bushels of sadness…if you were to use harvesting terms.
Now I know the news I have brought upon you has torn you down to your rawest of emotions…..but I know you are strong…I know you can make it through these hard times…my only hope is that we, as a people, can make it through this together. That being said, the time is now to stand up and fight for our freedoms to have at least one Putay for every household. As your president, I will make sure that Karate Kid will NOT be remade by Will “aww hell no” Smith…or any of his fellow Bel-Air party-mates. As leader of the newly formed Larusso Preservation Society I will never rest until all men know the timeless lessons we, each of us, can learn from our dearly departed friend and leader Pat Morita… the mistakes we can avoid by watching the rise and fall of John Kreese as a Karate sensei, his short return to the military, only to fall again under the command of Marshall Murdock and John Rambo’s quick knee to his manhood… and his eventual rise and second fall as mastermind behind the plot to get back at Morita and Macchio for that scene outside of the All Valley tournament. Yes, the time is upon us. We will be having group meetings in the Southeast starting October 29th. We need you to be there with us. The tentative title for our Southeastern meetings is:
“Fighting Kreese in the Southeast”
Here is a list of places where said Meetings will be located:
October 29th – Atlanta, GA – Smith’s Olde Bar
October 30th – Tallahassee, FL – The Beta Bar
October 31st – Gainesville, FL – Backstage Lounge
November 1st – Savannah, GA – Savannah Actor’s Theater
November 2nd – Charleston, SC – The Map Room
November 3rd – Greenville, NC – Spazzatorium Galleria
November 4th – Richmond, VA – Alley Katz
Bring the War to Kreese’s Door!
-Commander
P.S. – To those who live in, or near, Orlando…we are sorry to inform you that your own Social has seen fit to cancel our meeting there. I guess they feel that we can’t “bring the party.” We were forced to move it to Gainesville, FL. War.
