ACT II: THE FATHER OF DEATH
•••••••••••••••••
Intermission
The Good Doctor
Father Of Death
The Hounds
The State Vs. Thomas Light
Give Us The Rope
How The World Fell Under Darkness
Breaking Out
Keep Quiet
Light Up The Night
The Fall
Here Comes The Arm
•••••••••••••••••

ONE WEEK.

Even though its only seven days away, you can reserve your physical copy of “Act II: The Father Of Death” today.

*As usual, we recommend the physical copy of this album, because it is the only way to get the complete experience without me coming to your house and interpretive dancing my way around your family and pets for 57 minutes. Believe me, you don’t want that. It’s super creepy. I should know… I’m the one that has to do it. For instance, I’m an incredibly huge Kate Bush fan, but I don’t know if I could handle a personal ‘in house’ interpretation of Wurthering Heights. Save yourself the awkwardness… get the physical copy. To persuade you even further, Act II comes with a 24 page booklet filled with story and excitement. Act I only had 16… that’s almost 8 more pages!

Questions some have asked about the release of Act II —
1) Q: If I PreOrder Act II this week, will I receive it on or before the 8th of Sept?
A: Absolutely not. Act II is still at the fancy pressing plant, but will be ready for mailing on the 8th. No sooner. We wish it could arrive on your doorsteps on the 8th… but we’re not wizards of magic. Our hands are tied by machines and time.

2) Q: I want the digital copy to tide me over until my physical copy comes in the mail. Where can I buy a Digital Copy of Act II on Sept. 8th?
A:  Because iTunes seems to take forever to process albums, we don’t know if they will have it available that day. However, we DO know that it will be available on Amazon.com on the 8th. We’ll let you know more about all this on that special day.
*SEPT.8th UPDATE*  Act II is available on iTunes and Amazon. Choose your poison.*END UPDATE*

3) Q: Hey, Commander, have you ever seen a big bear riding in the back of a pickup truck?
A: If you had asked me that question a little over a week ago, I would have slapped you right in your eye…. but time has a way of changing a man. Things are different now. I’ll never forget. Still looking for normalcy. Freedom Fries. Have you ever seen something so powerfully raw and beautiful that it sucks the tears right out of your face? I stand before you now, a new man that has seen that “something.” For me, it took the form of a Majestic Black Bear standing in the back of a pickup truck that had a Dreamcatcher hanging from the rearview. Proving a lifelong theorem of mine, that dreamcatchers can land you a pet bear…and now I’m in the unexpectedly expensive process of buying a warehouse full of dreamcatchers…not bears. If my calculations are correct, you don’t need to buy bears because one dreamcatcher is good for at least one bear. *Actual Bear to Dreamcatcher ratios may vary due to geographic location*
If you have any information on the whereabouts of said bear, please respond to this Craigslist ad that I posted.

Album Release Show Update –
For those of you that are planning on buying presale tickets to the show, but have been procrastinizing all over the place, you may want to hurry up. We just got word that it looks like a shit load of you are coming on Sept. 25th. “Atta Boy/Girl,” to the ones that have already prepared themselves. “Shame on you,” to those that haven’t. Don’t get left out in the cold.

To those of you who have been asking. Let it be known that The Protomen are NOT playing DragonCon ’09. Blame in on the rain. HOWEVER… if you are going to be there anyway, you should go watch our friends – How I Became The Bomb. Does it help you to know that their drummer helped out on Act II?

Twitter?
Yeah. If you are into such things, you might as well start following the shit out of us, because we may or may not be getting more deep up in it. It sorta creeps me out in a lot of ways, but it seems to be pretty powerful for quick bursts of viable information. And I know how much you love viable information.

We’ve got work to do,

-Commander

p.s. – In case you haven’t heard… “Light Up The Night.”
***This is a whole song from Act II, so don’t listen if you don’t like hearing things.

After all the intense amount of  waiting you’ve had to wait through. After all the never ending pain you’ve had to endure. The wait is over….the never ending pain has been proven to be not so never ending! That’s right, people….things are really starting to look up. You’d better cancel all your dinner plans, lock up all your babies, and wish your fathers had never met your mothers, because….SHARK WEEK IS HERE! Its time to sit your ass in front of any TV you can find and watch hours and hours and hours and hours of the Tom Selleck of the sea, SHARKS!

In honor of this momentous, albeit annual..or semi-annual….or poly-annual occasion (does anybody actually know how often Shark Week happens?), we’ve decided to give you all a sneak preview of all of Act II . At the link below, we will provide a 49 second clip of every song on Act II. I know, I know…you can thank us later. OR………you can thank us right now by purchasing your very own Act II shirt! It is now available for pre-order, and is quite a looker, if you ask me. The ladies love it! The guys admire it! Its just like wearing AXE body spray….except you don’t have to be a date rapist to wear it!!! *That last bit is a fact. It’s been clinically tested….in a clinic.

Now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for…………………………………………………………………………….
…………………………………………………………………………..
…………………………………………………………………ACT II Preview!!!!

BIG ANNOUNCEMENT TIME:
Speaking of momentous occasions, you know that Act II will be available on Sept. 8th, but what most of you don’t know is that the Act II Release Show is scheduled to happen on FRIDAY, SEPT. 25th.

Let me tell you a little something about the show:
As some of you may have expected, the show is going to happen at Mercy Lounge in Nashville (what can we say, we like those assholes). What some of you won’t expect is that we are going to have TWO stages. A 10 Piece String Section. 10 Member Choir. An Unnumbered Horn Section. …and we will play the entirety of Act’s I&II back to back. Well, sort of back to back. Makeup And Vanity Set is going to play during intermission!

So, hop on your Shatner Machine, find your cheap plane tickets and hotel rooms, and then start preparing yourself for one ferocious night, because it’s not like going down the pond chasin’ bluegills and tommycods. This show…. swallow you whole.  Here’s to swimmin’ with bow legged women.

Speaking of bow legged women (who are generally just as nice as regular legged women, and should not be discriminated against)…. The good people of Mercy Lounge have set up a special Pre-Sale for everyone on our Mailing List. That’s you. Don’t get left out in the cold. GO HERE and enter the magic password: dfetterman
*Word on the street is that if you get one of these super code protected Pre-Sale tickets…you may just receive a fancy little something at the show. I’m not really sure what street that word was heard on, but I’m somewhat positive that it was heard on at least one street.

UPCOMING SHOWS:
Between now and then, we are going to be playing a few shows up the East Coast. We’re making our way up to Baltimore to make our third appearance at the annual (8, 16, 32, 64)Bit Genocide party. If you’re one of those people who are into the video games and the PacMan, you should put forth your best effort to be at Ottobar in Baltimore on Aug. 22nd.
••••••••••
The list of upcoming shows you should attend is as follows:
AUGUST-
20th – Knoxville, TN – The Midtown *All Ages*
21st – Richmond, VA – Plaza Bowl – (along with How I Became The Bomb) *All Ages*
22nd – Baltimore, MD – Ottobar – 64Bit Genocide
23rd – Ashville, NC – New French Cafe *21+*

SEPTEMBER-
25th – Nashville, TN – Mercy Lounge (Act II Release Show)

•••••••••••••

You know what you have to do.

-Commander

Let me tell you a story….
This isn’t one of those pretty bedtime stories where everything works out neatly in the end and the lessons are learned and the heroes are rewarded….
This isn’t the story about a father who puts his work before his wife and kids and waits until the last minute to try and find the coveted Turbo Man action figure, complete with all accessories…that was Jingle all the Way, my friends…and this….is not that story. We didn’t see Sinbad once that whole weekend.

This is a story of Mud.
The kind of mud that gets everywhere…gets all over you…gets into everything…deep.
This…is the story of Bonnaroo…

Early on the morning of the 11th of June, 13 Men and Women carefully packed an airport shuttle bus, a late 80’s model 15 passenger van, and a 1967 Shasta Tow-along Camper. Now, you may ask yourselves why 13 people would need over 25 seats worth of vehicle space and only camper space to sleep 8…well, my friends, this was Bonnaroo…a place where math doesn’t exist and logic is clouded by hallucinogenic drugs and hippie body odor. Not to mention Mud.

When we arrived, no less than 3000 cars were stuck in various mud holes in and around the fields of Manchester, TN. We alone made it through the swamp, knowing that if we were foolish enough to stop we would surely sink and die…until this guy with a badge and a poncho waved us to a stop in the very middle of the bog of eternal saddness. And so we sank… And there we stayed for 4 long days… Taunted by the mind-numbing repetitive mind-numbing repetitive beats of Paul Oakenfold. Disheartened by the fact that we knew every word to every song that Jimmy Buffet played in the distance. and hopeful that somewhere not too far away, Moe’s tour bus was in the same nightmarish predicament that we were in. “Move, you stupid horse,” indeed.

That was Thursday.

I’m happy to say that the sun came out on friday and dried up all the mud…I’m sad to say that the sun failed to dry out any of the mud in and around our particular campsite. Somewhere along the way, one of us thought it wise to find bails of straw to cover the worst parts of our campground river. This effort was applauded…for the first 30 minutes. Shortly thereafter, we found that once wet, straw tends to give off a smell that it no doubt learned from the place from whence it came…a cow field. It wasn’t long before our campground smelled like a steaming pile of ddb.

Now all this may sound like the long and muddy set up to a terrific tragedy…but nothing brightens up a rainy day like the sound of war drums on the horizon.
We came to Bonnaroo to battle Phish. And battle Phish we did.

We prayed to the gods the morning of the 12th, We smeared war paint on top of the mud on top of our faces, We heaved the official Bonnaroo transport golf carts we’d been commisioned out of the mud around us and made for the stage…like falcons covered in mud head for a muddy rabbit on the mud prairie. Keymaster even painted a fresh pair of shoes. When we got there the only deity we’d prayed to that actually managed to show was Jesus Christ…and we’re pretty sure he was stoned…but nonetheless, we prepared ourselves for the fight.

It was a glorious fight.

We lost….big time.

But we had fun…and as Commander’s high school football coach used to say…”you kids stay away from those Sodomy Parties”.

…and stay away from those sodomy parties, we did.

The End.

We’d Like to thank everyone who showed up to help us battle Phish. Together, we made for a tough tough foe.
We’d like to thank Mikie Martel for decorating the beautiful Artist VIP Lounge …oh and playing trumpet for us.
We’d like to thank Converse and Onitsuka and Korg USA for greeting us with open arms, no matter how many assholes we tried to pile into their tents at once.
We’d like to thank BMI, Mercy Lounge, and Bonnaroo for having us out and making the trip a glorious one.
We’ll see you guys next year…
Protomen out!

Oh….I guess there’s more news to be had…

From the Dept. of All Things Act II related:
I know many of you marked your calendars with a large question mark based on a strange countdown on the new and improved ProtoSite.
We would like to officially announce that the end of that countdown will mark the beginning of a post-Act II world.
Get ready.
No word on the official release party date.
More info to come.

From the Dept. of What can I do to hang out with my favorite Protomen between now and then:
You can get your ass to Nerdapolooza. It’s in Florida… it’s on the 12th of July…and it’s name even scares us.
Along with Nerdapolooza…we’re playing a few select shows in route. Check the tour schedule for more info.

From the Dept. of Merch:
New Shirts will soon be available online. They’re beautiful and much less stifling than those hoodies we’ve seen some of you sporting out in the hot June sun.
Don’t be a dummy. Put the hoodies away until the fall. Buy the new shirt…very soon(we’ll let you know as soon as the pre-order starts on Zambooie).

From the Dept. of Past and Future Members of the Proto Army:
We’d like to officially send our condolences to the wives of Scartoe and The Keymaster.
We’d like to officially send our Thanks and regards to the wives of Sir Robert Bakker.

Those who are gone will forever fight upon the eternal stage of glory. Except Keymaster….he’ll be a pharmacist.

-Panther